Missing Sam
by BettyHall223
Summary: Jack is missing Sam while she is in Atlantis.


_Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are not my property. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: I attended the MEET THE MAN event in Vancouver, BC, and met Richard Dean Anderson in person! After I had my picture taken with him, we chatted for a few minutes and as I gazed into his brown eyes, it nearly took my breath away to see those dimples up close and personal when he smiled. He is so very handsome, friendly, witty and one of the most charismatic men I've ever met. He autographed a picture of himself for me and it is now on my desk in my house. I will treasure both photos forever. Meeting Rick was a dream come true. After four years of e-mailing each other, I also had the opportunity to finally meet and talk with Fanfiction writer Su Freund who has become my friend. The whole event was absolutely fantastic and I would love to do it again!**

**Now, on with the story. Flashbacks are in italics.**

Jack lay in bed with his hands behind his head thinking about Sam while staring at the little spider web on the ceiling. Sam had noticed it when they finally lay down in bed that first night in their new house.

He had told her he would get a broom the next morning and tear it down, but in the chaos of getting furniture in place, unpacking some of the many boxes, mowing the overgrown lawn and buying groceries, it had slipped his mind.

_After finally retiring, he had come back to Colorado Springs. He and Sam agreed that this was home and where they wanted to live the rest of their lives._

_They had finally sold their houses and found another that they both liked, so they had put in a contract to buy it._

_Although she had planned to stay a little longer, Sam had left the next day for Atlantis to take care of an emergency situation._

_A week later, he had sent a message to inform her that their contract on the house had been accepted and he assured her that he could handle all the packing details and hiring the movers._

_Since Sam had rushed back so quickly to Atlantis and knowing she would like to be on Earth for the move-in to their new house, Hank had given her clearance to come home and surprise him. It also happened that the day of the move was their one year wedding anniversary._

Sighing deeply, he ran his hand across the empty space beside him. Pulling Sam's pillow to himself, he breathed in the lingering scent of Sam's shampoo as his mind drifted back to the last night she was here.

_Sam had been back on Earth for four days but tomorrow she would be returning to Atlantis._

_They made love in their new house until late at night and he held Sam in his arms as she tried not to cry, knowing she would soon be leaving him yet again._

_The next morning he stood beside Sam in the gate room. She turned to look at him and he embraced her as she slid her arms around his neck._

"_I love you, Sam."_

"_I love you too, Jack."_

_He was so much in love with his wife that it literally hurt as he watched her walk to the top of the ramp. With tears in her eyes she turned and gave him one last wave before walking through the event horizon. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he watched her step into a world that was millions of miles away; away from him and everything they had come to love about each other._

_He stared at the wall behind the stargate, wishing that Sam would suddenly return, telling him she was finished with trying to save Earth and she wanted to come home to him, home to stay._

_Daniel stood beside him. Seeing the expression on his face, Daniel placed his hand on his shoulder and gave it a squeeze as he said "leaving you is always difficult for her too, Jack."_

_Glancing at Daniel, he nodded his head, fearing tears would come to his eyes if he tried to voice a reply._

_After saying goodbye to Sam, he returned to their house._

_Already missing her desperately, he knew that keeping busy would help him not to dwell so much on their situation._

_Going into their bedroom, he stared at the bed and remembered holding her in his arms after they had made love one last time this morning. After taking the sheets off the bed to wash them, he pulled the pillowcase off his pillow. Starting to do the same with Sam's, he decided to leave her pillow the way it was, just to have the scent of her close by._

Before Atlantis there had been his job in Washington and Sam's in Nevada.

When they had married, they knew it was inevitable that they would have to be separated for long periods of time.

He remembered one particular event when he was still in Washington.

_After a late afternoon meeting with the President, he returned home to his condo and took a hot shower, knowing it would help ease away the stress of his job. While he had been in the shower, Sam had phoned and left a message, asking him to get in touch with her as soon as he had a chance, so he called immediately to see if something was wrong._

_Sam told him that she thought she might be pregnant._

_They had discussed having children before they were married but they decided to wait and see if either of them would need to relocate, if a pregnancy actually occurred. They agreed that if they did start a family, they both wanted to be involved in their child's life from the very beginning._

_They talked for a long time, trying to come up with the best solution for them and the baby. Would he retire and come home to the Springs and she go back to Stargate Command so they could be together? Would it be best for him to move to Nevada or should she transfer to Washington?_

_Ending the conversation, they agreed they should wait to see if she definitely was pregnant before making any decisions._

_He lay down in bed realizing that a baby would change their lives completely and knowing that he had missed so much of Charlie's life, he would not do that to this baby._

_The thought came to mind that since he was already in his fifties, he might not live to see their child grow into adulthood, but even if he would be an older dad, he knew that he and Sam would be very happy to welcome a baby into their lives._

_When the pregnancy turned out to be a false alarm, they both had been deeply disappointed. Sam had taken a few days leave and flew to Washington, needing to see him; needing to be held in his arms as she cried out her sadness and disappointment._

_He called his assistant and had her cancel his appointments for the next two days. He and Sam stayed inside, talking a lot, making love and enjoying this rare time alone together._

_Trying to deal with still fragile emotions, Sam had to return to Area 51 and he needed to get back to work at the Pentagon._

He sighed deeply as he remembered how hard it had been on them both as he watched Sam board a plane to return to Nevada.

_They had known the very real possibility that Sam might be stationed off world and that is exactly what had happened when she had taken command of Atlantis, and although he wished she was here with him, he would never ask her to be less than she was. Her career had been, and always would be, important to her and he would not want it any other way._

_After working with Sam for so many years, he knew that she was destined for greatness. She would eventually have stars on her shoulders, making him even more proud of her than he already was._

_He would always encourage her in her career, let her soar because she had earned it._

_Although he missed her every second they were apart, he would rather have Sam with him just a few days every few months than have any other woman with him every day of the year._

_Wandering down the hall of their new house, he stopped and looked around. There were books that needed to go on the bookshelves, dishes to be unpacked and put in the kitchen cabinets, pictures to be hung and boxes to be unpacked in the room they would use as an office._

_Coming into the den he opened a box that was sitting on the floor. It was filled with pictures that Sam had carefully packed. He sat down on the sofa and picked up the picture on top that was wrapped in bubble wrap. Pulling away the layers, he stared at the picture of Sam and himself that had been taken by the photographer inside the church after their wedding ceremony. He and Sam were gazing into each other's eyes and smiling. Sam looked the happiest he had ever seen her and for the rest of his life, he would always remember how extraordinarily beautiful she had been in her wedding dress. Tears moistened his eyes as he sat back on the sofa and stared at his wife. He could hardly believe his good fortune to have won the heart of this kind and amazingly intelligent woman._

_He lay the picture down beside him and picked up the next one. As he unwrapped it, a grin came to his face. Sam was at the altar of the church, crouching to the floor as her dress pooled around her. In front of her stood her four year old niece, who had been Sam's flower girl. She was also wearing a long white dress and looked so cute with flowers woven through her long blonde hair. Sam held her bouquet in one hand and the palm of her other hand was gently placed to her niece's cheek and they were smiling at each other. During the few days before the wedding, he had quickly discovered how much his new niece adored her Aunt Sam._

_He stared at the picture for several moments, wondering if Sam would ever get to experience the joys of motherhood and give her niece a little cousin._

_He stood up and placed the two pictures on the mantle above the fireplace._

Turning his head, he looked at the picture on his nightstand. Sam was by herself in her wedding dress, standing on the church lawn in the sunshine after the ceremony. It was a candid shot that the photographer had snapped when Sam had not been aware he was taking it. The wind was slightly blowing Sam's veil. She was bent over a little at the waist, her hands pressed together below her stomach as she held her bouquet and she was laughing at something someone had said to her. She looked radiant, relaxed and happy. It was his favorite picture of her and every time he looked at it he couldn't help but smile.

Until Sam was back on Earth, back in their house, back in their bed and in his arms, he would miss her.

After staring at the picture for several moments, he reached up and switched off the lamp. Turning on his side, he held Sam's pillow in his arms and wished she was here beside him, as he closed his eyes and reminded himself that tomorrow he would be sure to tear down the spider web.

The End


End file.
